Because we survived 80s childhood — and somehow became the adults in charge.
This design says what we’re all thinking: our inner child is still running the show… and she’s a raccoon on a dumpster fire, eating snacks and doing her best.
“Raccoon on a Dumpster Fire” is the unofficial uniform of the generation that grew up unsupervised, fueled by sugar, chaos, and grape soda — and somehow turned out functional(ish).
It’s soft, witty, and weirdly comforting — because if we can survive metal slides, lead paint, and emotional repression, we can survive anything.
Premium cotton blend — soft like denial, cozy like nostalgia
Unisex fit — perfect for every recovering 80s kid now running on caffeine and coping mechanisms
Vibrant retro print — equal parts humor and therapy
Zeke Squad exclusive — because adulthood is just childhood with bills
Wear it loud. We may be older, but that inner raccoon? She’s thriving, feral, and still flipping off expectations.
• 100% combed and ring-spun cotton (Heather colors contain polyester)
• Fabric weight: 4.2 oz./yd.² (142 g/m²)
• Pre-shrunk fabric
• Side-seamed construction
• Shoulder-to-shoulder taping
• Blank product sourced from Nicaragua, Mexico, Honduras, or the US
Size guide
| |
LENGTH (inches) |
WIDTH (inches) |
CHEST (inches) |
| XS |
27 |
16 ½ |
31-34 |
| S |
28 |
18 |
34-37 |
| M |
29 |
20 |
38-41 |
| L |
30 |
22 |
42-45 |
| XL |
31 |
24 |
46-49 |
| 2XL |
32 |
26 |
50-53 |
| 3XL |
33 |
28 |
54-57 |
